Europäische Kommission kündigt Einigung auf Englisch als offizielle Sprache der Europäischen Union an.

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other option presented . As part of the negotiations, the German Government conceded that English was in widespread use, but managed to earn concessions as part of its negotiations to correct some of the spelling and pronunciation issues. As a result the EU as a whole has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan for what will become known as "Euro-English ".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy . The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter .

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter .

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling . Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away .

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v ".

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru. Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.

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